Fool for Love.

I'm in relationship limbo, but at least the realm has walls that I can see now.

I finally heard back from Lin, after almost two weeks of not hearing from her. Needless to say I was going a little stir-crazy. She confessed how the last few weeks have been difficult for her because she's having to sort through the realizations and repercussions of everything she did last semester, and that talking to Emily and I has been hard because of it. Which I understand- sometimes working through things take time.

Plus, I'd be lying if I said I didn't do at least one snoopy dance when she said that time with him wasn't all sunshine and rainbows.

I said I was sorry she was going through all of it and that I wish I'd tried to help earlier last semester. But the truth is, she says, you can't rescue someone when the prison is their own body.

It's not easy being in love with a crazy woman.

She keeps telling me she's trying to protect me from the other side of her, from her darkness, and I keep telling her I'm not going anywhere. I guess it's going to take something bad happening and me staying put for her to realize I'm telling the truth.

I've come to realize that it really is true. Yeah, I might get scared, but when I think about her all I can think is that I want to be able to make her happy. To make her feel like she doesn't have to hide, and that people will help her through the bad spots. But she's worried that if we take this any farther and actually make a serious thing out of it that it will ruin our friendship. But I think that the best relationships have to be based on something to begin with. And I'm not sure I could handle being around her any other way, now that I know it's possible. I love all the parts of her, good and bad, and all I can do now is wait for her to tell me how she wants to move forward.

It's waiting, but I've gotten used to it. And I think it's something worth waiting for. There are risks in life that are worth taking, and I've never been more sure about anything. Sometimes that scares me, but I figure it will all work out in the end.